Why Did You Like This Fantastic Four Trailer???

By Kevin J. Kessler

The teaser trailer for Fox's "bold" re-imagining of Marvel's first family of super heroes, the Fantastic Four, has been met with nothing but contempt and anger from fans since the first details of its story were revealed to the public. 

I mean, come on, Johnny and Sue Storm are two different colors? Reed Richards looks like he's 12, and Dr. Doom is a BLOGGER? Seemingly all forward motion on this project turned everyone into this guy...



So when Fox released the first teaser trailer for this film, I watched with no expectations whatsoever, and was met with a completely underwhelming science fiction teaser that looked nothing like the Fantastic Four. Exactly what I expected. While the Fantastic Four, in any incarnation, has never particularly entertained me, one thing I can never get enough of is Nerd Rage. So, I flew to my lap top eager to see the outcry, and what I found was...the exact opposite!

Facebook was flooded with scores of folks writing encouraging posts regarding this potential turd. I saw a slew of "Wow, this might not be so bad," and "I can't wait!" I'm sorry but ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?

First off, Reed Richards is played by the douchey kid from Divergent (which I also hated) who has a baby face. Dude looks like he's 13. And he's playing the patriarch of Marvel's First Family??? Now, I'm no Reed Richards lover. In fact, he's probably my least favorite character in all of comics. But even a fantastic hater such as myself believed this to be rather poor casting.

My next point is, WAS THE THING NAKED!? 

Are we going to see The Thing's thing!?

Are we going to see The Thing's thing!?

I mean look at that! It's his rocky rear end! Did Fox just really want to answer the age old question first posed in Mallrats? Does The Thing have an orange dork? And those costumes look terrible. Maybe Ben Grimm agrees with me, and that's why he's choosing to strut about all natural. 

So tell me, internet, what was it you liked? In all of the comments I saw, there were no specifics. Just generalizations. Am I getting punked here? Did I miss something? Or am I just creating my own Nerd Rage in the absence of the rage of strangers, which so delights me?

Gah, I digress. This is what I'm doing instead of watching the Super Bowl.